When we lose someone we love, it’s natural to want to honour them in a way that feels right.
The reality of death brings both emotional challenges and practical considerations as families prepare for the loss of a loved one.
But the idea of a traditional funeral doesn’t resonate with everyone.
In recent years, more people in the UK have been choosing a quieter, simpler option: the direct cremation. But what exactly does that mean, and how do you know if it’s the right choice for you or your loved one?
When someone dies, there are important steps to take, and after a person has died, families must make decisions and arrangements that mark the transition from life to death.
Let’s gently explore what direct cremation involves and why more people are choosing this alternative send-off for themselves and their loved ones.
A Gentle Goodbye, Without the Fuss
At its heart, direct cremation is a simple and dignified way to say farewell. But it is very different from a traditional funeral.
A direct cremation takes place without a funeral service, without mourners in attendance at the crematorium, and often at a time chosen by the crematorium rather than the family.
A direct cremation is also known as an unattended cremation, because no family or friends attend the cremation. There’s no ceremony, so no hymns or readings, or gathering together with family in a chapel.
Your loved one is taken into the care of a funeral home, cremated respectfully, and their ashes are returned to you – or scattered on your behalf in the garden of remembrance at the crematorium, if you prefer.
It’s as straightforward as it sounds, but that doesn’t make it any less dignified or respectful.
The main difference between attended and unattended cremations is whether family and friends gather together for a service before the cremation takes place.
An attended cremation allows loved ones to gather together to attend a ceremony, to spend time to honour and remember the life and achievements of the person who has died, before the cremation takes place.
While unattended cremations do not include a service or allow for mourners to attend the crematorium. The cremation goes ahead in a quiet, simple and dignified manner.
In fact, many people are drawn to direct cremations precisely because of their simplicity. For some, there’s comfort in knowing that their farewell can be private, and free from the pressure and expense of planning an event with all the tradition and ritual, during an already emotional time.
Why More Families Are Choosing Direct Cremation
There are many reasons why direct cremation is becoming more common. One of the most significant is the freedom it offers. Unlike traditional funerals, which often follow a set format, direct cremation provides a range of options, allowing families to choose what suits them best.
Without the time constraints of a traditional funeral, families have the space to grieve at their own pace and can plan a memorial at a later date, after the cremation has taken place, that truly reflects the person who has died.
Some hold a small gathering at home where friends and family can come together to remember. Some choose a celebration of life event in a place that held meaning; a favourite pub or hotel or outside in the countryside or at the coast. These gatherings offer a chance to celebrate a loved one’s life in a way that feels right for everyone involved.
But others may choose to keep things entirely private. The point is, it’s your decision.
Direct cremations can also be more affordable than a full funeral service. With fewer elements involved – no hearse procession, no venue hire, no officiant fees – the costs are significantly reduced.
The services included in direct cremation are typically more streamlined compared to traditional funerals, so it’s important to understand what is provided in each option. For some, this brings relief during an already challenging time.
But beyond the financial aspect, it’s also about values. More people are moving away from religious and traditional formalities and towards something that feels more authentic.
If your loved one was someone who didn’t like a fuss, or if you’re someone who prefers a more minimal, personal approach, a direct cremation may align beautifully with those preferences, offering a dignified send off that truly honors their memory.
Can a funeral director arrange a direct cremation?
Absolutely. Whilst you may have seen adverts on day-time TV promoting direct cremations, these ads are promoting large corporate companies and so do not offer the same local and personal service provided by a local funeral director.
If you choose a direct cremation with one of these corporate companies, arrangements are made via call centres and online forms
The deceased are all taken to large centrally located mortuaries in the UK. And if they die in hospital, they may remain in the hospital mortuary beyond the period that is required by the hospital to process the paperwork.
It is not possible to visit the deceased once collected with a corporate direct cremation company, or for your loved one to be dressed in their own clothes. And the family is not told the date of cremation, and the ashes are returned to the family by courier.
Whereas, local funeral directors offer direct cremations that focus on providing a local, caring and personal service to families – often with no or little difference in the price of the direct cremation compared to a big national provider.
A funeral director has many years of experience in arranging local funerals for local families. As well as taking care of all the practical arrangements, funeral directors also provide emotional support to families during this difficult time. And after the cremation, they can help with arranging a memorial service or creating a special ashes keepsake for you to treasure.
What Happens During an Unattended Cremation?
When you choose a local funeral director to arrange a direct cremation, they will come and collect the person who has died and bring them into the care of the funeral home as soon as possible.
The deceased is looked after with compassion and dignity throughout at the local funeral home. You can choose to visit your loved one in the Chapel of Rest at the funeral home if you wish to do so. And you can request for your loved one to be dressed in their own clothes. You can even add personal items into the coffin if you wish to do so. Certain items have to be removed before cremation, but your funeral director will advise you on this.
All the practical arrangements for the direct cremation are taken care of by the funeral director. They will help with the legal paperwork and documentation and will liaise with the crematorium on your behalf, making the process simple and straightforward for families.
The funeral director will transport the deceased to the crematorium. They are then cremated in a simple coffin, usually made from cardboard or plain wood. This takes place at a local crematorium, usually in the early morning or during a quieter period, and without a formal service.
It’s not possible to attend the crematorium, but that doesn’t mean the process is impersonal. In fact, funeral directors take great care to ensure the moment is treated with the utmost respect.
Once the cremation is complete, the ashes can be scattered on your behalf in the garden of remembrance at the crematorium. Alternatively, if you wish for the ashes to be returned to you, the funeral director will collect them from the crematorium on your behalf and place them into a basic ashes container, or an urn or your choice. The ashes can then be interred at a final resting place, scattered in a meaningful location, while others keep them close in their home or use them to create jewellery or keepsakes.
How to Arrange a Direct Cremation For A Loved One, Step by Step
Arranging a direct cremation can feel daunting, in the same way a traditional funeral can. But with the right support, it can be a straightforward and gentle process. Here’s how you can arrange a direct cremation, step by step:
- Contact a local Funeral Director. Begin by reaching out to a local funeral director who offers direct cremation services. Their experienced and compassionate team will guide you through every stage, answering your questions and helping you make informed choices about the funeral arrangements.
- Provide Necessary Information. You’ll be asked to share some details about your loved one, such as their personal information and any wishes they may have expressed about their funeral, including whether they have made arrangements for their funeral in advance with a pre-paid funeral plan. This helps ensure the arrangements reflect their life and values.
- Collection and Care. The funeral director will arrange to collect your loved one from home or care home or hospital mortuary. They will be brought into their care at the funeral home as soon as possible, and will be cared for with dignity and respect throughout the process.
- Choose an Unattended Cremation. Select a direct cremation that fits your needs and budget. Many funeral directors offer a range of direct cremation options, some allow you to choose a more personal coffin, others allow for a few people to attend the crematorium for a short time just to witness the committal (the final moment when the coffin, which is positioned on the catafalque at the crematorium, is removed from view before the cremation).
- Complete the Paperwork. Your funeral director will help you with all the necessary paperwork, including any legal documents required for the cremation to go ahead. This support can be invaluable at a time when paperwork may feel overwhelming.
- Visiting your Loved One in the Chapel of Rest. When you choose a funeral director to arrange a direct cremation, you will be able to visit the person who has died in the chapel of rest if you wish to do so.
- Personal Care for the Deceased. You can also request for the deceased person to be dressed in their own clothes when you choose a direct cremation with a local funeral director. And you can place special and personal items into the coffin if you wish to do so. Some items are required to be removed before cremation, but your funeral director will advise you on this.
- Cremation at the Local Crematorium. The funeral director will respectfully transport your loved one to the local crematorium. Once the coffin has been carefully placed on the catafalque (raised platform) in the service room, the funeral director and team will bow their heads as a mark of respect before leaving. The cremation takes place without a formal funeral service or mourners present.
- Receiving the Ashes. After the cremation, the ashes will be hand-delivered to you, or you may prefer to have them scattered in a garden of remembrance at the crematorium. When the ashes are returned to you, you may wish to have them interred, scattered at a meaningful location, or turned into a precious keepsake.
Throughout the whole process, your funeral director will be there to support and guide you, making sure every detail is handled with care and compassion.
Arranging a direct cremation can give you the space to grieve and remember your loved one in a way that feels right for you and your family.
Can you pre-arrange a direct cremation?
Yes, pre-paid direct cremation plans are available.
Planning ahead for your own direct cremation is one of the most thoughtful and caring things you can do as you document the type of send-off you want, you make financial provision and you ensure your family will get the support and expert help they will need from your chosen funeral director when the time comes.
Is It Still Possible to Say Goodbye?
One of the most common questions people ask is whether direct cremation allows for a proper goodbye. The short answer is yes – just in a different way.
While there’s no traditional service, as funeral directors, we still encourage families and friends to come together in a way that feels right for you to honour and remember the person who has died. Gathering together in the days, weeks or even months after the cremation – when the initial shock has passed and people feel ready – is important to provide support and comfort to each other during this difficult time of grief.
But for some people, they are able to find peace in the idea of letting go of a loved one without ceremony, honouring the memory of their loved one in everyday moments rather than in formal ones.
It really is about what feels right for you.
Making It Affordable: Options for Every Family
One of the reasons so many families are choosing direct cremation is its affordability. Direct cremation offers a dignified farewell without the financial strain of a traditional funeral service.
Things to Think About Before Deciding
Choosing how to say goodbye is deeply personal. Direct cremation isn’t right for everyone, so it’s important to think carefully about what matters most to you and your family.
Here are a few things to consider:
- Did your loved one express any specific wishes? If they were someone who didn’t want a fuss or disliked the idea of a big funeral service, this could be a beautiful way to honour that.
- How do you feel about not being present at the cremation? Or how would your family feel about not having a funeral service to attend? For some, this is a relief. For others, it may feel like something is missing. Think about what will bring you, and the people involved, peace in the long run.
- Would you want to hold a separate memorial later on? You absolutely can, and many people find this more meaningful when the initial intensity of grief has softened.
- Are there any religious or cultural customs to consider? Some traditions place importance on attending the cremation or following certain rites. It’s important to ensure that your choice aligns respectfully with those beliefs.
- Do you want to have a pre-paid funeral plan in place? Choosing a pre-paid direct cremation plan can help lock in costs and avoid unexpected expenses in the future.
If you have questions or need guidance, our friendly team is available to answer your questions and provide support as you make these important decisions.
The Quiet Power of Simplicity
There’s a quiet strength in choosing simplicity. Direct cremation is not about cutting corners or avoiding grief – it’s about creating space. Space to breathe. Space to feel. Space to remember in a way that suits you.
It’s not a second-best option, and it’s certainly not impersonal. For many, it’s a deeply thoughtful decision—one that prioritises care, practicality, and emotional wellbeing.
It also allows families to avoid the stress of organising a formal service while still honouring their loved one in their own time and way. In some cases, it’s also an empowering choice for the person themselves – someone who wants to remove the burden from their family and keep things simple after they’re gone.
In Closing
Grief looks different for everyone. There’s no one right way to say goodbye – and that’s okay. What matters most is that you’re able to honour your loved one in a way that feels meaningful and true to them.
Direct cremation won’t suit every family or situation. But for many, it offers a peaceful, affordable, and flexible way to remember someone special – without the pressure of tradition or ceremony.
If you’re unsure, take your time. Speak to someone you trust. Ask questions. And when you’re ready, choose the path that feels right for you.
Because in the end, it’s not about how we say goodbye – it’s about the love we carry forward.
If a direct cremation is the right choice for you or your loved one, take the time to consider which company can provide you with the support, guidance and type of service that you require.
Local funeral directors are experienced in providing a personal and compassionate service to families, to not only to handle the practical arrangements but more importantly, to help you through the difficult days and weeks that follow the death of a loved one.
Let Us Help You
Here at Hillier Funeral Service, we are here to help local families in Swindon to arrange any type of funeral, whether that’s a quiet and simple direct cremation or an elaborate traditional funeral.
Or if you’re thinking ahead and considering a direct cremation for yourself, we can help you make arrangements with a pre-paid direct cremation plan.
Please give us a call on 01793 522797 or contact us.